Youve always written about your mind, your past, and all the time that has gone by. What ive failed to realize is that for you, there is no more time going by. You live to have fun and forget about everything actually going on around you. Its hard to know you love someone that doesn’t realize they are your fun.
Some mornings all I want to wake up to is you, frustrated in the living room trying to make it to the next line. to fit the pieces together of everything running through your mind. Struggling to accept the sum but not at all wanting to rewind.
You’re right, I am okay. You said it yourself. I’m right, you are too.
You’ve got a good soul. I just wish you would look around and stop living through the stories you’ve told.
An instance is not fictitious.
Take care of your demons.
Everyone has their own demons I suppose, it’s just a matter of figuring out how to get rid of or absolve them. Some are created from your past and some are an internal creation. Mine, I believe are Derived from an internal dissatisfaction. It’s not something I accept, it’s not an anger I let take over me until I feel that things are out of my control. At those moments, I feel centrally disconnected from my body, as if I’m watching a problem progress until the final explosion. Where everything that exist around me becomes fictitious. When I wake up I deal with it. Demons, anger, are so many different forms. Jealousy is probably the most normal and hardest to control. I’m jealous of a lot of things. I’ve let this overcome me at times where it wasn’t actually necessary. By the time I’d learned my lesson with that situation, my other problems had taken control and nulled out the conscious progress I had made.
Dealing with demons means being aware of thoughts and problems in your mind, even when you don’t want to face it.
Make your own life.
First of all, it doesn’t solely mean making your own friends or spending your few hours of alone time. It means waking up and knowing that everyday you have a goal to do something for you and by yourself not because you have to because you want to. I do like myself. Why has it been so hard to face myself lately… The answer..Demons, I’m aware, and they’re on their way out now.
I have aspirations to be nothing but better. I like being well rounded and sometimes indecisive. I think you have more opportunities to learn when you’re thrown into a situation & hell I love the feeling of being nervous and working through problems in “the most efficient way”
Take nothing for granted.
Taking for granted means: to expect someone or something to always be available to serve In someway without thanks or recognition. To value something too lightly. ( this lesson is also knowing that it’s okay to act and not expect reciprocation)
Working towards a sense of Convenience with no reciprocation is indefinitely included in “taking something for granted.” It is also the stiff subject of realizing how strongly you overlooked that certain convenience, whether its love, friendship, or just sharing the company of someone that you enjoy being surrounded by. It can even be the absence of realizing that you have been Immersed in a love that is the full potential a person is able to offer. Possibly because they are satisfied with their own life or because that is all their demons will allow them to share. I do understand that concept. No one loves of communicates or cares in the same way. That is what I find awesome and mysterious about people. That’s why we make friendships and date because with some people our means of communication don’t collide. When they agree it’s a comforting sensation. The way I love and perceive friendship, I feel, is very open. I want my friends to know that no matter what I am doing I would stop everything to be there and help them if they needed. I feel this is even stronger for people I love, maybe that’s not how it works for most people… But that is a part of how I was raised, that’ I will always appreciate and I’m sure will often be taken for granted.
Do anything that answers your soul.
What Are the answers to your soul? Is it simply a hobby you enjoy? Does it have to be a specific talent, a passion? Can’t the answer to your soul be the drive to succeed. I don’t have to know what I am reaching for yet. I’m still learning and we all will be.
Still… Moving forward.
El bait shop.